Hope (Part 8)

[amythest_n_ice]

http://amythest-n-ice.livejournal.com/27289.html

Link to Hope Part 7
http://amythest-n-ice.livejournal.com/35401.html
Link to Hope Part 9
*********************************

Jack glanced over at Ianto as he walked back to their rooms beside him.

 

“Are you OK Ianto? You’ve been kind of distracted since you picked me up from the med bay. Is something wrong?”

 

“No, sorry Jack, I was just miles away.” Ianto tried to shake it off, there was no way he was going to tell Jack, in his condition, that he was starting to fall for the man he loved. Jack didn’t need to hear that.

 

“Did the Doctor say something to you?”

 

“Only that he was going to stop leaving you hanging.”

 

“He did, he’s given me some things to think about. I don’t want to hurt you Ianto, but…”

“But you want to be with him.”

 

“Yes.”

“Jack, I already told you, I will back you, whatever you want to do. You need to focus on what is best for you, and that child you’re carrying.”

 

They reached their rooms, and Ianto ushered Jack onto the couch, propping him up with pillows.

 

“I know Ianto, but I don’t want to hurt you, or push you away.”

 

“Jack, I promise, I will be there as long as you need me to be, and it will hurt less, knowing that you are safe and happy. You’ve been unhappy too long Jack, you deserve better.”

 

“So do you, Ianto.”

 

“Jack…..”

 

“You’re falling for him, aren’t you?” Jack said bluntly, cocking his head to one side. Ianto jumped, startled, and Jack saw guilt and misery in his eyes.

 

“How did you know?” He asked in a small voice.

 

“Sorry, the pregnancy is starting to affect my telepathic barriers, that was right on the surface of your mind.”

 

“I’m not going to get in the way Jack. I know how much he means to you. You’re not going to tell him, are you?”

 

“Ianto, you can’t help the way you feel.”

 

“I know, but still, I am not going to be the cause of that much stress for you, you don’t need it right now. Come on Jack, you should get some rest.”

 

“I don’t need to rest Ianto, I need to think. The Doctor says that my pregnancy is accelerated, I only have ten weeks, max, before I give birth. I need to get my head around that, as well as figure out what I want to do.”

 

“You know what you want to do Jack, you want to stay here with him.”

 

“Knee jerk reaction, yes, I want to stay. I have to figure out if that’s really what is going to be best for me and this baby.”

 

“So, if you only have a couple of months until you deliver, does that mean you know if it’s a boy or a girl?”

 

“Nope, the Doctor and I didn’t want to know, the TARDIS will let you see when you look at the scans if you want, then it’s up to you if you want to tell Martha or not.”

 

“No, if you guys don’t want to know, I don’t see why I should, and Martha can just wait and be surprised with the rest of us.”

 

Jack smiled his approval of Ianto’s decision, leaning his head back against the cushions and closing his eyes as he tried to put some order into today’s surprises.  He felt Ianto drape a cover over him, and smiled faintly, getting more comfortable and cradling his stomach lightly in his hands. He heard Ianto puttering round, tidying up a little, finding the book he was in the middle of, and the familiar sounds made him drift despite himself. The next time Ianto glanced over, Jack was sound asleep.

 

**

 

Ianto found Martha in the TARDIS kitchen, rummaging through the cupboards looking for something.

 

“Hi, how is he?” She asked, looking back over her shoulder.

 

“Sleeping,” Ianto said with a shrug, moving to put the kettle on.

 

Martha gave a snort of triumph and pulled the packet of ginger snaps her mum had given her last time she was home from the back corner of the cabinet, idly checking the sell by date before opening them.

 

“How’s he handling the pregnancy? I don’t really get chance to ask him.”

 

“He’s coping, he doesn’t have long now until he gives birth,” Ianto said, holding up a second mug as he took his out of the cabinet. She nodded and leaned past him to grab a plate to tip some of the biscuits onto.

 

“So do they know what it’s going to be yet?” She asked as they sat at the kitchen table a few minutes later to have coffee and biscuits.

 

“No, they don’t want to know.” He shrugged.

 

“Are you OK Ianto? You don’t seem yourself today.”

 

“I….. you don’t want to know, really.”

 

“Come on, you might as well tell me. You’re so busy being a tower of strength for Jack, and an advisor for the Doctor, who do you have to tell your troubles to?”

 

“Jack knows that I have feelings for the Doctor,” he said very softly.

 

“You told him that?” She squeaked, shocked.

 

“Of course not, what do you take me for? I would never do that to him. He told me.”

 

“What?”

 

“Apparently his telepathic barriers are a little unreliable right now, he saw it in my mind when I was taking him back to our rooms before.”

 

“What are you going to do about it?” She asked.

 

“Nothing, what can I do? Jack loves the Doctor, the Doctor is confused enough about Jack. They don’t need me throwing another spanner in the works.”

 

“But, Jack does love you too, you can see it, when he looks at you.”

 

“Not as overwhelmingly as he loves the Doctor. He’ll make his decision Martha, and I will respect it, and support it, any way he wants me to.”

 

“Seems kind of harsh on you.”

 

“I’ll live.” He sighed.

 

In the corridor outside the kitchen, the Doctor leaned against the wall, shocked. He hadn’t meant to eavesdrop, he’d just been aiming for a cup of tea, but the subject of the conversation had stopped him in his tracks. Moving as silently as he could, he slipped away from the kitchen, heading back along the corridor. He paused on the threshold of the console room, biting his lip, then carried on along the hall, heading for the rooms where Jack was asleep. He wanted to talk to him when he woke up.

 

tbc